Posted by: kerryannekay | November 9, 2017

Wimp

Well, I think that the boys’ last vet visit has officially determined the true wimp…and it’s not who you think.

One of the things I like to do when I take the boys to the vet is ask the technicians to cut their nails.  Lamont is super cool with the technicians and enjoys their attention and cuddles.  I they always tell me, “Oh, he’s such a lover.  He enjoys it when we hold him close.  He was so well-behaved for us.”

Fred doesn’t get the same feedback…

The last time I was told, “Well, Fred is done…”

I asked, “How did he do?”

The technician coyly replied, “He complained a bit.”

“A bit?” I asked, “Didn’t I hear him screaming back there?”

“Yes,” she smiled at me, “quite loudly.”

“Oh, my,” was all I could say.

“We had to use three technicians to do his nails,” she informed me.

“Three?” I gasped.

“Yeah,” she said quite seriously, “that does cost extra.”

“Fred,” I said turning to admonish him, “you are a pain in the butt.”

The technician giggled at me.  “I was just kidding,” she laughed.

“Wait,” I turned, “about the three technicians or the extra cost?”

“The extra cost,” she laughed, “but we did use three technicians to do his nails.”

“Fred,” I sighed, “What a wimp.”

“The doctor will be in to see you guys soon,” she said with a quick wave.

“Thanks,” I said smiling back.

I turned to the boys and told them both, “Boys, Lamont officially wears the pants in this family.    And Fred, I’m confiscating your man card…er… boar card… whatever…”

Life is always an adventure with these two…  I’m just glad I’m along for the ride…  – KA

Advertisements
Posted by: kerryannekay | October 27, 2017

The Blob – Part 2

So, there I was stranded on my couch.  The toad gave me a menacing look before hopping into the living room.  “NO!” I yelled at it, “Get back, you, you thing!”  It didn’t listen to me and took another hop towards the couch.  “I will, I will,” I stammered struggling for words.  I looked around frantically to throw something at it.  I locked in on a set of cork coasters, scooped them up, and held them up in a threatening gesture.

“I will throw these coasters at you!” I threatened the toad.  It didn’t listen and continued to hop along.  “I am serious!” I waved the coasters above my head.  I stood there trying to calculate the force and speed that I had to throw the coasters at the toad to just miss it so that way it would scare it back in the direction that I wanted.  “Once these coasters leave my hand, they will be accelerating at -9.8 m/s2 towards you,” I mumbled at the toad.  “I know these things,” I told it and added, “I’m a physics teacher!” for good measure.

The toad was not impressed with my mental gymnastics.  It made a half burp half call *brrrrrrruuuuup*.  “What the hockey sticks was that?” I said truly flabbergasted.  “Are you threating me now?!?”  *bb-bb-bb* the toad responded.  “That was a bloody threat!” I yelled.  I stood there holding my chosen weapon staring at the toad as he stared back at me.  “Don’t you look at me like that!” I told the toad.

*bruuuuuup* the toad yelled back at me.  “That’s it!” I warned and let one of the coasters fly.  It hit the rug behind the toad and successfully scared it into jumping…towards me.  “Nooooo…” I yelled and flung another coaster.  It totally missed, hit the rug, and ricochet off the wall.  It DID scare the toad into moving closer to the couch.  The darn thing took two large jumps and was right next to the back of the couch.

It looked up at me and glared menacingly.

I was determined not to break…to not cower… I lasted several seconds before ducking down and using the couch back as cover.  The toad knew he had me… *Bruuuuup* he mocked me.  “Go-o-o-o away!” I begged the toad.  “No offense,” I told the back rest of the couch, “your hideous and tracking mud on my nice rug…”  *Brup* the toad called back as if to say “NO”.

I sat there for several more minutes cowering on my couch.  That’s when I heard the toad hit something under the couch.  “Oh, no!” I said in terror.  “My couch isn’t nice enough to make it your home.”  *B-b-b-b* the couch monster called back.  “Crap!” I yelled and bolted for the front door.

I frantically unlocked the door, threw it open, and ran out of my own house.  Yes, I left everything behind over a toad in the couch.  I’m not proud of that decision but I did what I thought was necessary to…to…to…protect, yes, protect myself.  Unfortunately, my next door neighbor saw me blot from the house.

“What’s wrong?” he asked jogging over to me.

“There’s a…” I struggled to get out, “There’s a…”

“What?” he said with a tone and look of dismay.  When I didn’t immediately didn’t answer, he began to guess, “Squirrel? Bat? Rat? Raccoon?”

“There’s a toad in my house!” I blurted.

“A toad?” he said, clearly disappointed in my answer.

“YES!” I yelled and pointed at the house, “There’s a toad in my couch!” Then I desperately added, “GET IT OUT!  GET IT OUT!”

“Wait,” the neighbor giggled, “There’s a toad in your couch?”

“YES!” I breathlessly acknowledged, “It threatened me!”

“Threatened you?” he asked, “How?  What did it say?”

“Brup!” I mimicked the sounds that toad had made.

“So, it ‘brup-ed’ at you and that was considered a threat?” he asked as a confirmation.

“YES!” I responded.

“Call 911!” my neighbor joked.

I didn’t catch his tone or meaning.  “Why?” I said in terror, “Is it a poisonous one?”

“I doubt it,” he said starting towards the house.

“It’s under the big couch!” I called to his back.  “Be careful…” I whispered to his back.

Several LONG minutes later he returned with a GIGANTIC toad cupped in his hands.  “Blerg,” I commented as he offered it to me.  “No thanks…”

My neighbor put the toad down and it began to hop off towards the woods.  “It came out of that big pot in your kitchen… It made one heck of a mess…” he commented.  As he began to walk away he said, “Hope you have a rug cleaner…”

“I do!” I gratefully acknowledged.  “Thank you.”  When I walked back into the house I saw what a large mud trail the toad had made. “Yuck.” I sighed.  As I closed the door the boys realized that I was ‘home’ and started to call for food.  “Oh, boys, really?” I asked the empty hallway.  “You don’t know how close to death I just came…” – KA

Posted by: kerryannekay | October 19, 2017

The Blob – Part 1

I hate plants.  Everyone knows that I hate plants.  I have always refused to have plants.  So, when I decided to grow things at the house for the boys, the people that know me were shocked.  And yes, I shocked myself by the fact that I actually got things to grow…and to produce things… and those things were editable.

I shocked people even more by bringing in the plants when there was a frost warning… and setting them up with grow lights.  Hey!  Don’t even think of calling me a ‘plant hippie’.  I still hate plants.  But I do see economic value of growing things for the boys…

—–

On Monday I set up a table and some grow lights.  I lugged in the plants and their water trays one by one into the house and set them up.  I saved the ‘Big Boy’ for last.  ‘Big Boy’ is a 20+ year old plant that I inherited from someone who retired at school.  He’s in a 50 gallon pot and a large pain in the rear to move.  I took out the hand cart and literally lugged him inside into the kitchen.  One he was up on the water pan, I felt a sense of accomplishment.  ‘He will get plenty of morning light thought the sliding doors,’ I thought.

As far as I was concerned, I was done for the night.  I went to the couch and laid down for a ‘bit’.  Two hours later, I was rudely awakened by an odd noise.  *Brrrrrrr*  “What the heck was that?” I asked the empty room.  “Boys?” I called upstairs.  *wheek, wheek* Fred or Lamont responded back to me.  Then I heard something again: *bruuuuug*.  “What the heck is that?” I asked again.  There was no response.  It came a third time: *burghhhh*

“That came from the kitchen!” I whispered.  I grabbed my phone and a tissue box from the coffee table.  “What the hockey-stick is that?” I asked quietly.  *brup-brup-brup*  I slowly creeped down the short hallway past the house’s utility closet.  I stuck my head around the corner to see what was there.  There was a large dark blob in the middle of the kitchen floor.

“Oh,” I sighed, “I dropped some dirt on the floor.”  I figured that the noise was outside.  I walked into the kitchen.  The blob suddenly moved. “What the?!” I screamed and jumped back.  The blob jumped towards me.  “Holly fungus banana!” I yelled as I threw the tissue box in its general direction, grabbed a chair, and jumped on top of it.  “What the hockey is that!?!?” I added for good measure.

I clutched my phone seriously considering calling 911.  The blob made another noise.*brup-p-p*  “Aughhhh!” I yelled, “You’re a frog!  A Toad! Wait You’re a….  Which one are you?  Do you live in water or not?!?” I said arguing with blob on the floor.  “But, what are you doing inside!” I barked.  “How did you get in here?!?” I asked it.  Then I demanded, “GET OUT! GET OUT!”

The toad, er, frog, er, blob, gazed back at me with empty eyes.  It took another small leap towards me.  “AUGHHHHHH!” I screamed, jumped off of the chair, and took off into the living room.  I managed to hurdle the couch in one single leap.  As I stood there heaving in expiration and fear, I heard the blob make a noise *brrrrr*.   Then another *brrrr* came.  The second one was closer.  I leaned over the couch and saw that the blob was at the edge of the kitchen and utility hall.  “NOOOOOOOO!” I yelled as it leapt on to the rug.

“SON OF A MONKEY’S UNCLE!” I shrieked.  “STAY IN THE KITCHEN! STAY IN THE…”  I was too late.  The blob leaped again.  It was now half way down a very, very short hall and moving towards me…

Well, I will have to leave you here in the story.  It’s late and I’ve got school in the morning.  But I promise that next week’s blog will include how I got rid of the blob.  Have a good week! – KA

Big Boy

The Plant that I call “Big Boy”. – KA

Posted by: kerryannekay | October 5, 2017

Wake Up!

Lamont needs to seriously stop waking me up at random hours in the night.  He has woken me up screeching for food at various times between 1:00 am and 5:30 am.  The 5:30 am was the worst…

*Wheek, wheek, wheek,* went the beast at 5:30 am.  I rolled over and placed the pillow over my head.  He went off again.  This time it was a long and agonizing *wheeeeeekkkkk*.  It was one of the most pathetic things I had heard in a while.  Then the quick intermittent calls started: *wheek, whe* pause *wheeeKK* pause *WWWWhhhhweeeekkkk* pause *wheek, wheek* I couldn’t stand it.  “LAMONT!” I yelled from under the pillow and added, “Cut it out!”

The barrage of calls continued: *w-w-w-week, wh, wh, eek, eek*  Fred decided to join in with a joyous *WHHHHEEEEEK* I moaned again and rolled over.  Several moments later the boys started a call a response game with each other.  *wheek* went Fred and Lamont responded *wheek, wheek* Fred played along *wheek, wheek*.  Not to be outdone, Lamont responded *wheeeeeeeeek*.

I couldn’t stand it anymore.  “BOYS!” I yelled from the bed and sat up.  The pillow went flying.  There was a moment of silence.  Fred started to chatter his teeth in anger at me and Lamont began to whine.  “Ughhh,” I sighed and went to get out of bed.  As I stood, I realized that the covers were wrapped around my legs.  Actually, I realized that too late and fell over.  The boys took noise of my body hitting the floor as a sign that I was getting up to feed them.  They began to joyously wheek for me.

“Are you two happy that I fell or happy that you made me get up?” I asked the dark cage.  “Either way, that’s cruel,” I added.  I heard the boys scramble up their ramp and over into the kitchen side of their cage.  Clearly I wasn’t going back bed until I fed these two brats.  I untangled myself from my blankets and threw them back onto the bed.  I set to my work in the light of a small night light near the boys’ cage.

“Okay,” I sighed.  “Here is some hay,” I said as I grabbed some from the box and placed it in their hay hanger.  I heard one of them start to popcorn in excitement.  I took some treats out of the bag I leave near their cage and tossed them randomly into the kitchen area.  I heard them bounce off of the paper covered floor of the kitchen.  Both boys began to popcorn excitedly.  “Okay,” I yawned, “I’m going back to bed.  I hope your both happy…”

I walked back to bed and plopped myself in.  I didn’t even bother with the tangled covers.  I yawned one more time and rolled over.  I felt sleep pulling my eye lids closed…

Moments later:  <BEEP> <BEEP> <BEEP> went my alarm.  “Crud,” I cried out, “I just laid back down!” I moaned.  The boys didn’t care.  I heard them happily dancing.  Their mom was up and they were going to be fed breakfast.

I reluctantly got up and started my day.  The first thing I did was go downstairs and made the boys’ breakfast.  I went upstairs to deliver the precious cargo to the boys.  “Breakfast!” I called to the boys.  Silence.  “Boys?” I asked.  There was still no movement.  I put their food down in its usual spot.

I looked into their cozy sacks.  They were both out cold.  “Lovely,” I groaned, “You two get to sleep the day away and I have to go to work…” I left the bedroom and went on to take shower and start my day…again.  – KA

Posted by: kerryannekay | September 28, 2017

Failure to Change

Guinea pigs can be very fickle when it comes to what they like and what they don’t.  The boys are no exception.  That being said, I still try to introduce them to new foods, items, and snacks.  Most have failed…

The Roller Snack Ball

The “Roller Snack Ball” is a toy that can be loaded with treats.  As the ball is rolled around by the pet, the treats will fall out… I thought that this was a great thing for the boys.  I thought that they would love it.  I was wrong.

I put the loaded ball into the boys’ cage.  Lamont saw it and bolted.  He would not come out of his snuggle sack.  Fred walked up to the ball and sniffed at it.  He nudged it with his nose.  It moved slightly and rolled back.  Fred was so upset with it that he began to click his teeth in anger.  “What’s the matter?” I asked rolling the ball towards Fred.  He jumped back and hissed at the ball.  When I went to pick up the ball, Fred lunged at it.  “Whoah!” I yelled snatching my hand out of the way.  “Okay,” I quickly added, “I’ll get rid of it…”  I grabbed the roller snack ball and threw it in the garbage.  “That was a waste of $19.99,” I sighed.

Blueberries

I have seen so many videos of guinea pigs enjoying blueberries lately.  I decided to buy the boys some to try.  I put four of them for the boys.  They were intrigued and went over to sniff the berries.  There was a lot of sniffing and a lot of nudging the blue berries.  Fred stopped and looked up at me.  “Okay,” I responded, “I’ll go away and let you eat in peace, divas.”

Several hours later, I came back to check on the boys.  The four blueberries were still sitting there.  I was puzzled.  They seemed to be so interested in them.  I threw out the old berries and replaced them with four new ones cut in half.  Again, the boys were interested in the blueberries right away.  Lamont began to sniff at them and popcorned.  “That’s right,” I encouraged him, “those are good and good for you… try them…”  I left to do some house work.

About an hour later, I returned and saw the blueberry halves sitting in a puddle of pee.  “Well,” I sighed, “I guess you don’t like those…”  Fred popped his head out of his snuggle sack and sniffed at me.  “Yeah, get rid of them… message received. That was a waste of $3.99.”

Snacks

I have bought, tried, and given every type of possible snack to Fred and Lamont.  They want nothing to do with them.  I see all of these guinea pigs running to their moms and dads when they hear the treat bag shaking.  Fred and Lamont hear me shaking a bag and start to rumble strut.  They think that they are going to get ‘lucky’ and come running.  “Silly boys,” I always tease them, “This is not that type of treat…”  I then added, “Here, try these dried bananas.  All of the guinea pigs on the internet love them…”  Lamont sniffed at the treat and then bolted.  “Dude, you are such a wimp…” I taunted.  Fred approached cautiously and sniffed at the treat.  He immediately turned his nose up at it.  “Fred,” I scolded.  “You need to at least try it…” Did he?  Nope.  “That was a waste of $5.99.”  The boys have turned their nose up at every treat I have offered them.

I have not been able to change the boys’ cage for many months.  They get all angry and mope around when I do.  I can’t even wash their snuggle sack without the risk of a large temper tantrum.  They have gotten used to what they like and are not afraid to

Tell me about it.  *sigh* I just wish I had figured that out before I wasted so much money. – KA

Posted by: kerryannekay | September 14, 2017

Sneaky Smell

You recall last week blog?  The one about the boys escaping and going rogue?  The lost pile of bean was found by my mother last weekend.

On Saturday, my mom came over to help me move and rearrange some stuff in my bedroom.  In the process, we took the time to vacuum in the neither region of the bedroom.  After five minutes of work my mom asked, “What’s that smell?”

“What smell?” I replied from the closet.

“It’s not a pleasant one…” she said trailing off.  I stuck my head out of the closet and saw her sniffing around the room.

“You look like Fred and Lamont on the trail of some veggies,” I laughed as I went back to work in the closet.

“No, I’m serious,” she relied to my taunt.  “And it’s not just that those boys need a good butt wash…”

“Uh-huh,” I called back as I compared two shirts.  “You do the butt wash and let me know if they actually smell better.”

“Kerry Anne,” my mother interrupted my thought process, “you need to come out here and smell this…”

“Mom, it’s the boys and their cage… You’re just not used to them.  Trust me.  They don’t smell that bad!” I told her.

“No, no, no,” she said quietly, “They’ve left you a pile of poop somewhere…”

“Uh-huh,” I said continuing to sort clothes.  After several minutes more, I heard my mom moving stuff around the bedroom.  I went out into the bedroom and plopped down on the bed.  “I’m telling you that you are not going to find anything…” I smugly told her.  She continued to search.  “Okay,” I sighed, “I’m going to lay here until you decide that we are going to finish what we are here to do…”

“Uh-huh,” my mother said under her breath.  Several moments later she moved the side table and took in a sharp breath.

“Dust bunnies?” I joked with her.

“What’s brown, smells really bad, and has a white crust on it?” my mother asked.

“Your cooking?” I joked with her and giggled a bit.

“No!” she declared, “your carpet!”

“Crud,” I sighed popping up off the bed.  I looked behind the side table.  “Yeah,” I sighed again, “they left that the last time they escaped…”

“Okay,” my mother declared, “I’m done here…”  She turned and went to leave the room.

“Wait!” I blurted, “Aren’t you going to help me clean this stuff up?”

“Those are your ‘kids’” she teased me, “it’s not my job.”

“You are their grandmother,” I replied and added, “You’re supposed to step up and help out their mother when she’s in need…”

“I’ll go and get the carpet cleaner…” she said after a long pause.  I heard my mother start down the stairs.

“Most grandparents enjoy cleaning up their grand kid’s messes…” I shouted as she went down the stairs.

“That’s so last year…” my mother called back.

All I could do was sigh at her comment.  I looked at the large, crusty poop pile and began to calculate how I was going to tackle the mess.  I heard the boys scrambling about their cage.  It was business as usual for them.  My mom returned with the carpet cleaner and we began to tackle the mess together.  After we were done, we gave up on the original purpose of visit.  The dust bunnies could wait… – KA

Posted by: kerryannekay | September 8, 2017

Gone Rogue – Part 2

So, there I was, on the floor, rubbing my nose staring at the receding butt of a guinea pig.  I was the victim of a ‘nip and run’.  A moment later Lamont came trotting around the corner.  When he saw me he stopped mid stride.  He turned his head and looked at me curiously as if to say, “Why are you down here?”

I replied simply, “Don’t look at me that way…”  Lamont just huffed at me and continued on his way.  I rolled on to my back and stared at the light above me.  ‘Huh,’ I thought, ‘I need to clean that…’  Lamont started chutting next to my ear. “Uh-huh,” I sighed still fixated on the light.  He started to whine at me.  “Fine,” I said sitting up.  Lamont bolted.  “Oh, crud, dude,” I called.  “Just stand still so I can get you back into your cage.”

I was met with silence.  I stood up and went into my bedroom.  There was no sign of either guinea pig.  “Boys!” I called to the room.  “At least make some noise so I can find you…”  Silence.  “Boys?” I called again.  Silence.  “Lovely,” I sighed, “now it’s a guinea pig hunt…”

I stated checking around the room.  I checked behind the bed, behind the dresser, and in the closet.  I couldn’t find them.  “BOYS!” I finally yelled.  Silence.

I walked out of the room hoping that the boys will come out.  I stood still for several minutes waiting for a noise or movement.  Nothing.

I broke the silence with, “I am not going to play this game!  Come out now! Boys!”  I paused and added, “Boys?”  I ended with, “Please come out… Boyyyyysssss….”  They were not budging.  “Are you hungry?” I teased.  Silence.  “Fine!” I hissed.  I opened the cage fence, grabbed their food bowl, and stomped out of the room.

“I should let you both starve,” I hissed under my breath as I walked downstairs.  I made a second dinner for them and went back upstairs.  When I got up there, I announced, “BOYS!  Here is your ‘dinner’, again…”  I loudly plopped their bowl down in an effort to attract them.  I didn’t stand around to see if they ran over to the dinner bowl.  I was too smart of that.  I went downstairs and plopped myself in front of the television.

A show later I went upstairs to check on the boys. They were both in their snuggle sack snoozing.  “Uh-huh,” I sighed while closing the cage fence.  They didn’t move.

I spent the next fifteen minutes searching for the boys’ hiding spots.  My efforts were fruitless.  I sat down on the bed and saw a small leg stretch out of the backside of a snuggle sack.  Fred was stretching out for a good snooze.  “At least you had fun,” I giggled to myself.  “But, I’m not looking forward to the finding the hidden pile of beans you’ve left in your wake…”  – KA

Posted by: kerryannekay | August 31, 2017

Gone Rogue – Part 1

When I got home one Sunday after dinner with my parents, I went upstairs to feed the boys.  I walked into the room to greet them.  “Hey guys!” I called.  There was no response.  Not thinking anything of the silence, I grabbed their bowl and went downstairs to make their dinner.

When I was downstairs, I heard the boys running around up in the bedroom.  I laughed at their zoomies.  “They are happy that I’m home…” I said to the vegetables that I was chopping.  As I finished up, I heard more movement upstairs.  “Wow,” I sighed, “you two are loud today…”

I went upstairs and put the bowl in the boys’ cage.  When I called for them to come out for their food, they were silent again.  “Okay,” I teased, “you can both eat when I’m gone.”  Again, I didn’t think much about them not running out to their food bowl.  The boys are secure in the fact that when they call, I will feed them.  I went back downstairs to watch television.

Again, I heard the boys racing around upstairs.  I giggled and thought, ‘I guess that they want to burn off their dinner calories before eating…’  Several minutes later Lamont started calling to be fed.  “Dude, it’s in the cage!” I called back to him.  He quieted down and I went back to the television.  The noise came again.  “LAMONT!” I called back, “Your food is in your cage… go eat it and stop begging for more!”

Lamont ignored my admonishment and immediately started whining for food…loudly.  “Jeeze!  Don’t make me come up there!” I warned.  He didn’t heed my warning and started up again.  I got up and went to the stairwell with the intent to just yell upstairs.  I saw a shadowy figure on the top of the stairs.  “LAMONT!” I said as I turned on the light.  As soon as the light came on, Lamont bolted.  “Crud!” I said starting up the stairs.  As I climbed, I mumbled words under my breath that will not be mentioned on this blog.

You see, Fred and Lamont aren’t allowed to free-range by themselves.  The like to eat the carpet.  That could cause them to have an obstruction in their digestive track.  So, no alone time when they are out of their cage area.

Where was I?  Oh, yes…  So, my focus was on getting upstairs and wrangling the boys back into their cage.  And then it happened…  I got to the top landing, right where Lamont was standing, and stepped in a pile of fresh beans.  “YUCK!” I yelled as I started to freak out a bit.

For the record, I hate stepping on beans…hate it…  They stick to the bottom of your foot!  Then, you have to walk on the side of your foot so you won’t ground them in or spread them on the rug.  And then, when you get them off, you have to clean your foot with some soap and water.  I hate stepping on beans.

Okay, back to the story…  So, yeah, I lost my cool at the top of the stairs when I stepped on Lamont’s beans.  Somehow I the panic, I managed to hook my other foot on the top step and of course, I fell.  Actually, I wiped out.  I slid a good two feet on my knees on the rug.  I felt the sting of rug burn immediately.  I rolled over to my side and moaned, “Ooooo, my guinea pigs are trying to kill me… again…”

As I looked into the open bedroom doors, Fred trotted over to me.  “Hey, you brat,” I scolded him.  He walked up to me.  I thought he wanted to snuggle.  “Did you come over here to comfort me?” I foolishly asked.  Fred took several more step towards me, reached out with his mouth, and nipped my nose.  “Fred!” I yelped.  He bolted back into the bedroom and out of sight.

I will leave you with the vision of two rouge guinea pigs loose in my bedroom as lay on the floor at the top of the stairs with horrible rug burn…  How I managed to get the boys back into their cage is the story for next week…I think I’ve managed to embarrass myself enough this week.  – KA

Posted by: kerryannekay | August 10, 2017

Tomat-NO

It’s getting to the end of summer for me…and that’s a total bummer.  On a positive note, the cherry tomatoes are starting to come in.  I’ve had several of the ripe tomatoes in my salad and they are awesome.  So, I decided to put some of the ripe tomatoes into the boys’ salad the other night.  As I walked up the stairs, I was thinking about how much they would love these home-grown tomatoes.  I was feeling good about all of the hard work I had put into those stupid plants…  That was until I put the dish down into the boys’ cage.  Here’s a transcript of the boys’ reaction:

Fred:  “Oh, dinner!”  *runs over to dish*

Lamont: “Dinner!” *runs over to dish*

Fred: “Parsley!” *munch, munch, munch*

Lamont:  “Pars…What’s that?” *looks down at cherry tomato and sniffs*

Fred: *stops mid munch* “What is what?”

Lamont: *sniff, sniff*

Fred: “What?” *drops parsley*

Lamont:  “That thing…what is it?”

Fred:  *sniffs at cherry tomato*

Lamont:  “Well?”

Fred:  “It smells like a tomato…but it’s different…”

KA:  “Oh, stop being so picky and just eat it…”

Lamont:  “Is it new?”

Fred:  “I think it’s new…”

KA:  “It’s from our garden…”

Lamont:  “Did you grow it?”

KA:  “Yes!”

Fred:  “Nope…”

Lamont:  “Nope…”

KA:  “What do you mean ‘nope’?”

Fred: “Nope, nope, nope…” *grabs parsley and back away from dish*

Lamont: *Grabs apple and turns away from dish*

KA:  “Seriously, you two? You’re not going to eat those?”

Fred:  *silence*

Lamont:  *munches on apple*

KA:  “Uh-hun…  I’ll come back later to see what’s up…”

*** 2 hours later ***

KA:  *Walks back into bedroom*  “So, you guys like the new cherry tomatoes?”  *checks food dish*  “Seriously?  You two ate EVERYTHING but the cherry tomatoes I grew?!?  You’ve both had them before from the supermarket!  I know you like the variety…”

Fred:  *yawns*

Lamont:  *continues to chew on hay ignoring me*

KA:  “Fine, we will try again tomorrow…”

The next day, I added more of the home-grown tomatoes to the boys’ meals.  They didn’t eat them.  Thinking that the cherry tomatoes were under ripe, I let them get redder then added them to the boys’ meal with some store bought cherry tomatoes.  The boys ate the store bought ones and not the ones I grew…go figure…  – KA

Posted by: kerryannekay | July 27, 2017

Gutters and Guineas

I had to get the gutters replaced on the house on Tuesday.  The repairmen showed up at 9:00 am sharp and got to work.  As I was watching television in the living room I heard the bending of metal and power tools working.  The boys were quite during this phase of the installation.  When the new gutters were being installed, the boys decided it was time to complain…

The first noises were from the screws being attached to the house with a power tool.  The drills made a “brrrrruuuuppt-brrrrrrrr-bbbbrrrruuppt” noise from the front of the house.  Fred took this as an invite to join in the party.  I heard him responding to the power tool.  “Brrrrrrrrr” Fred called back between power tool noises.  I went upstairs to check on the boys and get a firsthand look at the silliness.

Fred was rubble-strutting around the cage when I walked into the room.  “Oh, sexy pig!” I called to him when he stopped to listen to the power tool noise.  The noise stopped and Fred called back “Brrrrrrrrr”.  He walked around in a circle and wiggled his butt.  “Oh,” I teased Fred, “she sounds sexy… I think you may have a chance with this one!”

When the front of house was done, the workmen moved to the back.  I walked out to talk with them about the exact placement of the downspouts and the gutter extensions.  A worker was up on a ladder above my bedroom windows…that were wide open.  “Ma’am,” he called down to me.

“Yes,” I called back.

“It sounds like you have an alarm going off in your bedroom…” he informed me while tilting his head to get a better fix on the sound.

“Oh,” I asked, “like a clock alarm?”

“No,” the guy said, “it sounds like ‘O-o-O-woo-ooo-w-O-O’.”  He did his best to mimic the sound but sound eerily like a ‘Minion’.

“That’s the guinea pig alarm,” I laughed.

“The guinea pig alarm?” the guy asked.

“Yes,” I called up, “it’s the boys complaining about the noise that you’re making.”

“Wait!” the guy asked, “they complain?”

“Yeup,” I said proudly.

“Go ahead and put in another screw and listen for them…” I instructed him.  The guy put in another screw and the boys responded in kind.

“Wheeeeeekk!” Lamont complained.

“Brrrurrrurrppp, wheek,” Fred added his two cents.

“That’s really funny!” the guy called from the top of the ladder.  He moved and put in another screw.  As soon as the screw was in, he stopped and listened for the boys.  The complained back to him.  “That’s awesome!” he called down to me.

“Yeah,” I giggled, “they are two cool dudes!  I’ll get them and you can meet them when you’re done.”

“Sure!” he said with a smile and went back to work.  I noticed that as he worked, he stopped and listened for the boys’ response to his tool noise.  I also noticed that he had a large grin on his face.

When the gutters were installed, I grabbed the boys and they met the three workers.  These three tough guys all melted when they held Fred and Lamont.  They cooed and awed at them.  I think it was a nice break from their normal day.  It was a good day for everyone…and the gutters look great, too.  – KA

Older Posts »

Categories