Posted by: kerryannekay | March 20, 2014

Guinea Pig Farts

Did you know that guinea pigs fart?  I didn’t until I adopted Alfalfa.  In fact, I remember his first fart that I heard.  He farted so loud that it scared him.  I’ll admit that I was scared too.  And the smell!  Oh my goodness.  I had to call one of my guinea pig rescue friends to make sure Alfalfa wasn’t going to die.  Seriously, it really smelled like he was going to die!  But after about a half an hour of reassurance, I finally concluded that he was fine.

Since that first incident, I’ve heard Alfalfa fart only a several times more.  That’s a good thing.  Guinea pigs are not supposed to have a lot gas.  Lots of gas can mean serious stomach issues.  But I digress; back to my fart-y guinea pig.

The other Sunday I was lying on the living room floor watching television.  (Yes, I have a floor obsession.)  Alfalfa kept walking back and forth blocking my view of the television.  “Dude,” I complained, “quit purposely blocking my view of the television!”  He huffed at me and continued to pace back and forth.  “Alright,” I said and reached out to tweak his butt.  I pinched his butt and he took off.  “Ha!” I declared watching his butt wiggle under the bed skirt.  I had won.

"You can't prove it was me..." - A

“You can’t prove it was me…” – A

Five minutes later Alfalfa was back.  He started to pace in front of me.  “Again?” I sighed, “Don’t’ make me pinch your butt again…”  Alfalfa chattered his teeth as he walked past me again.  Then I smelled it.  He had farted as he walked past me.  “Alfalfa!” I yelled as I popped up, “Did you just crop dust me?”  The smell became more intense.  “Oh, dude,” I complained but Alfalfa was nowhere to be found.

“Alfalfa!” I scolded the empty room.  I saw the bed skirt flutter.  “HA!” I declared, “Yes, I see you…”  He stuck his head out from the bed skirt.  “What was that all about?”  He huffed at me.  “I bet you were planning on blaming that on me…  Goodness, what the heck have you been eating…  That stinks!”  Alfalfa huffed at me again and ducked back under the skirt.  Oh, the smell was so bad…so bad.  I had to go over the cabinet and pull out the air fresher.  His fart had stunk up the living room.

The moral of the story?  Well, guinea pigs do fart.  They stink.  And, apparently, my guinea pig likes to crop dust me when he does… *sigh*

Author’s note: It has come to my attention that not everyone knows what “crop dusting” means. Well it must be a local term. It means passing gas as you walk past some one and not stopping. The hope is to spread the joy and smell. I hadn’t heard the term till I moved here…

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Responses

  1. Ooh, my Zippy after a piece of banana!!!! He’d stink up the whole room! He did get gas a couple of times, and after ages of stroking his sides, he’d let go with a real stinker 🙂

    • It wasn’t me. It wasn’t. Mom didn’t analyze the fart. She’s accusing me of a drive by farting. Not fair! – Alfalfa

  2. My furkids always produce the silent but deadly winds. Serves me right for spoiling them with the occasional haricot vert. Especially Martok gets a little gassy sometimes. He always has that incredibly over-innocent face when I ask him about the bioharzard.

    • Yes. Alfalfa just doesn’t care. – Kerry Anne.

  3. Capybaras pass wind as well!

    Great blog as usual, Kerry

    • Liz, thanks. I’ve been very busy but it’s worth my time. – Kerry Anne

  4. My Tinkerbell done it yesterday it scared the living daylights out of me

    • The first time is scary. Then it becomes funny. – KA

  5. I’m dying! My daughter just complained that our Gabby girl farted on her and I didn’t think they could. So I came looking for answers. This was too funny. Our Gabby is always doing things to make us laugh. We set her up a pen and she will work hard to bust out. When we look at her and say, Gabby!, she hauls butt back into her pen. She knows she is busted. My daughter is teaching her to stand for her cilantro. She gets a kick out of climbing up grandpa’s face, my husband. We rescued her from the park. She was being chased by an owl during the day. Surprised the heck out of us and we’ve taking a crash course on their care as we had never had one. In happy to tell see is twice the size she was, knows her name and is confident in knowing she is well loved.

    • First of all, thank you for saving that Gabby. You are awesome. If you need help, go to: http://www.guinealynx.org. They have a ton of great information. I write a blog every week about the adventure of my boys. It’s about life and there silliness of two Guinea pigs. Also, I’m on Facebook. Feel free to contact me of you need some advice. – KA

  6. I just googled this and was so glad to see our Zippy Fred isn’t the only one. It’s the worst smell ever. I mean it lingers forever, doesn’t it? Not like a human toot at all. He’s gotten us a couple times. 😂

    • Alfalfa was bad. I’m glad you got a laugh. – KA

  7. I was so scared when I heard my guinea farthing and now reading this article I was laughing. First in 5 years I heard her like that. But she was crying in the same time 😕

    • Just watch her. Too much gas can kill a GP. Baby gas drops diluted with water and some yogurt can help ease the gas. Alfalfa got some drops after this incident to ensure he was okay. I hope your baby is okay. Thank you for the comment. Go to guinealynx.info if you have any questions. It’s an awesome site for GP information and care. Thank you for the comment. – KA


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