The Cable Guy – Part Two – The Arrival

Tuesday arrived and I was forced to get up way too early for a summer day.  My alarm went off and so did Alfalfa.  To him the alarm means:  “Mom’s up.  I’m getting food.  I need to let her know how much I want to be feed.”  Then the ‘I’m going to die of starvation’ noise starts.  I hit the snooze button on the alarm and the beeping stopped.  But, of course, Alfalfa did not.  I heard him dancing next to the bed in anticipation of being fed.

“Oh, geeze,” I said to the celling, “how the hell did I make an appointment for this early?  There has to be a mistake…there is no way I made an appointment…voluntarily this early…no way.”  Alfalfa’s wheeking got more anxious.  “Ok,” I called from the bed, “I’m up…”  I hauled myself out of bed and walked over to the refrigerator.

“This is the face of a terror…” – A

Half awake, I grabbed the box of salad mix for Alfalfa and walked over to his bowl.  Empty.  “Dude?” I asked, “How did you eat all of that food?”  Alfalfa huffed and me and did a bit of a popcorn and happy dance.  “Ok,” I said grabbing a handful of salad and placing it in the bowl.  It overflowed the bowl.  It was a super-sized portion.  Alfalfa looked up at me as if to say, ‘Really?  All for me?’  He didn’t ask twice and dove in.  I put the salad down and went to the bathroom to prepare.  I showered and dressed and prepared for my appointment.

At 8:02 am the doorbell rang and again, Alfalfa went off.  “WHEEEK,WHEEK, WHEEK,” he yelled.  “Yeah,” I called from the bathroom, “I heard it…”  Alfalfa continued unfazed by my admonishment.  I answered the door and it was the cable guy.

“Hello, I’m *name* from *name* Company.  I have an appointment on this address,” he informed me.

“Yeah,” I sighed, “And, you’re on time…”

“Thank you,” he said with a bit of pride in his voice.

“That wasn’t a compliment,” I mumbled.

Either he didn’t hear me or ignored me, “May I come in?” he asked.

“Sure,” I said.  “Be careful of the guinea pig…”

“Oh, I love pets,” he said as he walked past me.  The moment he entered the house, Alfalfa started to hiss.  The Cable Guy (CG) froze.  “Uhmmmm,” he said, “Do you have a snake?” he asked looking around with a concerned look on his face.

“No,” I said closing the door.  I turned the deadbolt on the door and it made a loud clicking noise.  The cable twitched at the noise.

“What’s that hissing and clicking noise?” he asked nervously.

“That’s my guinea pig, Alfalfa,” I said, “He’s not happy you’re here.  He’s hiding under the bed.  Let’s hope he doesn’t come out…”  I let the last comment hang in the air.

“Whaaaa?” CG asked.

“Here’s the cable box,” I said pointing at the television and box area. CG turned and got to work on my cable problem…and Alfalfa began to strategize on how to torture him…

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